It's been a bad few days...

I've been binging like crazy these past few days.

I'm guessing it's because that 'time of the month' is coming up. But that's really no excuse.

I don't even know what I weigh right now. I haven't even had the heart to step on the scales.

Anyway, I have a date for the trip to my grandparents'. I think my mom said either the 17th or the 14th of next month. That gives me plenty of time. I want to be at least 125 by then--120 if I can manage it. However, I won't be able to manage anything but 200 unless I get myself UNDER CONTROL.

So I'm leaving until I get down to 135. If by some miracle I'm already 135 (remind me... HOW am I still an optimist?), I'm staying away until I'm 130.

Also, I'm going completely raw veggies only for three days, and then attempting a week on the Master Cleanse. I told my mom about it--all wide-eyed and 'OMG, I just want to lose, like, five more pounds--I think I'll be at a happy place there'--and she was all "Ok... if you want to... but only for three days, and you have to eat something if you start feeling weird." HAHAHAHA as if. I'm making one modification, though: no salt water flush. I know, I know, it's supposed to be really good... but I've heard it's also really easy to poison yourself with it. I'm kind of leery of it, so I'll be sticking with just my 'Premium Chinese (Or is it Japanese...?) Slimming Tea'. Delicious--no, really, it is. XD

So yeah, I'll see you guys later--probably on the other side of the Cleanse... oh, lord, let it work...

Stay strong, starve on. xoxo