Wednesday, November 4, 2009

I feel so inspired~

Inspired to gag!

I mean, why are all these fat women posing semi-nude? WHAT?!

I'm sick of all the "It's ok to be fat, America! LOVE URSELF!!!!" crap. Fa'real. Because then they just turn right around and worship the skinnies. Nobody loves somebody who jiggles like a bowl of jello when they walk.

"All it takes is confidence... pride in who you are... inner beauty! Because beauty is only skin deep. D;" WHAT. A. LOAD. OF. BULL. Nobody gives a crap about your confidence in yourself--I mean, they won't even bother getting to know you unless you're skinny. They just pretend not to see you if you're fat--or befriend you so they look skinnier standing next to you.

My mom is fond of spouting the line "Attraction isn't physical--it's about your personality!" Well if someone's going to be attracted to your personality, they first have to be attracted to your body, right? Because if they're like "Oh my god, look! A walking whale!" they're not going to want to get to know you or your personality, so that point is just kind of... no.

On a different note, I binged last night. =_=; It's like after that damn bowl of pasta, I just threw everything out the window--all bets were off, and my mouth was running for food. Three pumpkin muffins, MORE pasta, plus more pumpkin seeds than I'd planned on. My only saving grace was that I overdid the cayenne pepper on my seeds, so they were spicy as all hell, so hopefully that gave my metabolism a kick up the ass. I didn't weigh myself this morning, and I'm pretty much fasting today. Today was supposed to be an 'eat' day, but I figured I had that yesterday. I'm going to have a salad tonight and that's IT. And then I have three fast days coming up tomorrow--which I'm probably going to ruin, but I'm going to get as far as I can into them. I mean, I finally completed a fast day before yesterday... who's to say I can't do it again? Just a few minutes at a time... plus gum and Sprite Zero. I swear to God, I worship that combo right now.

I also had my vitamins--discovering in the process why they say to take the cayenne pill with food. OW. But (TMI!) it gave me slight diarrhea, so that's a yay(I guess...? XD). They said to take three a day, spaced with your meals... so I have two more times of that. Though my third is going to be with my salad, so it probably won't affect me like that.
I also discovered some fiber pills--they're like 16 cals per two pills, though. They're that 'Fiber Choice' stuff. I figured I'd try them for a few days, too. I mean, fiber is always welcome. XD

Also, I read in SophiaRuins' blog that she tried that 'cold water makes you burn calories' stuff and that it worked. Umm... I tried it, too. XD I didn't make it even ten seconds. I was just standing there, counting slowly, attempting to make it to at LEAST thirty seconds before I leapt away, but I just couldn't hang. ._. Our water comes from a well... and it gets damn COLD out there! XDDD So the water was basically just about 10-20 degrees away from freezing. ._. So then I tried adding in a bit of warm water, just to bring up the temperature slightly so I could actually stand under it and get some results... and I made it thirty seconds. ._. Somehow, I doubt that's really doing anything for me. I'm going to keep trying though, definitely.

I've also discovered a new hobby--dancing like a total slut in the privacy of my bedroom. x] Fun way to burn calories! I'm just glad nobody can see--nobody likes to see a fat girl dance. Especially with all the dips and hip wiggling I do. XD And as Lola recommended a few posts back, I keep those arms above my head--at least every other song, for the entire song--and I feel the burn. I couldn't even pick up my can of diet soda after the first time I did that. XD I was like "...seriously? Am I really this weak? Are my muscles THIS out of tone? SERIOUSLY?!" It's still difficult, and I can't say that it's getting much easier, but hey, it's only been a few days. XD So, Lola, I love you, girl! In a totally platonic way, of course. ;P

I've also gotten into a rhythm of drinking a LOOOOT of water--which means a LOOOOOT of bathroom breaks. And so I had a brilliant idea: I would try doing tricep dips again, from the edge of my bathtub. Surprise: I felt it in my arms instead of my thighs. (Though I still feel it slightly in my thighs... a twofer? : D ) SCORE! So now I do ten tricep dips after every time I use the bathroom. I love being homeschooled, so I can do stupid crap like that. XD
I guess my arms just weren't on a low enough point the first times I tried doing it... Whatever, it's working now, so that's what I care about. XD Been thinking about adding in ten situps to that too. I can do them from my bed, with a pretty flat pillow under my back and head, and still feel the burn, so that's where I'm starting from. I've just gotta build up. x]

I'm going to go ahead and end this really long post now. I love you guys! Stay strong, think thin, etc! xoxo


  1. haha, I LOVE dancing like a slut! It's so much more fun than regular exersise! I'm the same as you in the shower, but i find that if you gradually make it colder and colder it's less of a shock than if you just have full blown freezing straight away!
    Stay strong

  2. Hee hee, I <3 you in a platonic way, too. Feel the burn, right? I have to chant "arms-up-arms-up!" to keep myself in line!


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